A strong support network is essential when faced with an experience such as this as there are many times when spirits drop and patience feels as though it has run out. At these times a supporting word of encouragement or even listening to complaints did wonders to help lift my spirits and shift my focus back to the positive.
Personal strength, a positive approach, a strong support network and a TRUST in the spirit world is what saw me through. I'm not saying it is easy to be positive all the time. It certainly is not, but it is amazing what fortitude you can muster when your back is against the wall.
The support of my partner, Paul was, and is nothing short of fantastic. I know he found the going tough but could not do enough for me. He was ever patient and loving. He took over the role of caring for and feeding our menagerie, which is time consuming. He began cooking wonderful creations and has continued, having found it rewarding. Our relationship is richer for our experiences. We have both grown individually and as a couple.
My sisters encouraged me to take up with their Meditation class. This was a wonderful suggestion and I thank Cecilie, Josephine and Marie McNeill who ran the group, from the bottom of my heart. I learned to meditate deeply, finding great peace and trust that I was being taken care of. I had many energy healing sessions which were very beneficial. One in particular I would call a miracle.
At one session which turned out to be cathartic for me (buckets of tears, the lot) I discovered that one reason for not wanting to die was that I wanted to ride the filly I had raised from a foal. I was unaware that this was so important to me. I have continued with meditation and spiritual development seeing obvious guidance in my daily life. My breast reconstruction is evidence, so amazing were so many facets of this procedure.
Talking about what is happening is very, very difficult but absolutely essential if you are to come to terms with the situation and begin the emotional recovery process. I found I dissolved into tears as soon as anyone said in all innocence "How are you?" It got easier as I became used to hearing my voice saying I was experiencing breast cancer and all its ramifications. The fear and horror that was deep down has gradually dissipated.
Talk about yourself and the situation you are in, it is amazingly freeing.
I look back in admiration at
my personal growth, new awareness and understanding of the oneness of
every being and spirit. I consider I have been given a huge growth challenge through breast
cancer and while it was difficult to the extreme, I know I am a better
person for the struggle. Most of all I am proud of myself for my
achievement and hope that other women can benefit from sharing my
experience through this site.
I consider I have been given a huge growth challenge through breast cancer and while it was difficult to the extreme, I know I am a better person for the struggle. Most of all I am proud of myself for my achievement and hope that other women can benefit from sharing my experience through this site.
I began riding my filly of 3 years just before Christmas 1999, almost a year since my diagnosis and 6 months after the completion of treatment. I had not been on a horse for twelve months. How fulfilled I felt, I had made it.
If you are interested in illustrated clinical information regarding Breast Cancer, I have found these sites particularly helpful:
A big thank-you goes to my surgeon Mr. Stephen Wilkinson, the nurses at the Royal Hobart Hospital Surgical, Oncology, Outpatients and Radiology Units for their generous care and emotional support.
Numerous sites can be found at www.cancerpatientsworkbook.com